Around the Table Discussion - When You've Been Corrected Accept It

Queen of Pentacles

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Interested in reading an excerpt from Seasons Change and So Do We book 2 called,  "The Beast In Theze Streetz"? 

Well, here you go...

Broken down from the floor up is all I was while he was here and even more when he left. I knew it was for the best but as time crept by all I could feel was more heart pain. Seeing the sun seemed so far fetched for all I could see were the gray clouds. If only I can make it til tomorrow. If only I can make it til tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes and then I secretly say to myself again, “If only I can make it til tomorrow. I will make it til tomorrow.” I can't explain my experience with this monster whom only seem/seemed to see his own pain...his own experience(s) with me but not mine. I know him so well.

He's only a pawn making me pay for past discretion with someone else in another life way before us. Getting into that past part of my life is for another time yet is so relevant to “why” so much pain exists today.

I'm strong.

I'm the Queen of Pentacles. There is nothing I can't be, know, or do. It's only a matter of me making it til tomorrow.

I find myself getting stronger day by day

I know he's feeling the loss of me because he LOVEs me... I'm the Queen of Pentacles.

I'm not bragging. Why should I? Not while living in this mess.

There is no reason to brag. Believe it or not, I just accepted who I am although many knew and felt I knew her all the time.

I did not.

Really. I knew there was something oh so special in me and all around me.

Thank God she was there/is here.

Thank God!

Without the shadow of the Queen walking where I have walk(ed), only she and God knows where I would be. I need this moment of the Queen's full debut. Right now. Give me a glimpse once again Queen.

She has been showing up more and more each day and staying by my side longer and longer.

The season of embracing her, oh yes,

my Queen-ness is right around the corner. I'll call her forth with the voice of my soul.

I'll breathe in and out daily beckoning her love, wisdom, beauty, and peace to come forth.

She is here. She is here. She lives here.

I must grab all of her. She awaits my grasp. I know she does. I feel she does. She always has and always will. There is a secret she must reveal.

She tells me of all the abuse I've endured at the hands of me and at the hands of him. The abuse was spiritual she says. I can't go back to such abuse. There is no surviving repeated visitation of abuse, she says.

No more!

I hear her say, Even a queen's heart dies under that kind of attack.

“Remember,” the queen says to me very discretely,

Remember that you are...

a mature spiritually grounded female, a businesswoman, with a high social status/a social butterfly, generous, loyal, prosperous, successful, financially independent, financially stable, wealthy, sexy, a homemaker, likes the finer things in life, down to earth, organized, sensible, practical, no-nonsense, kind, welcoming, nurturing, a healer, and most of all...a wonderful mother.

Seasons Change and So Do We

When Bloggers, Vloggers, and Podcasters UNITE

On 3 August 2009 I got one of my creative sparks.  Like many of my creative sparks, I didn't think twice or ask my angels for greater insight.  I only followed the instructions.  Over the years I have gotten quite used to moments like this. I used to wonder about all the ins and outs of such moments but not on 3 August 2009.  The instructions were way too clear to give thought to anything other than getting the job done.  Because I had so much clarity, I knew everything and everyone would fall in line as long as I allowed spirit to lead.  

About Your Host

Divine Instructions:

Reach out to other creative souls on social media and ask if they would like to share, barter, or trade blog/vlog/podcast space in order to feature each others businesses on social media.  Not only will our businesses gain attention but any products or services we offer will too .  All of this at no cost to those who decide to contribute to my blogs/vlogs.  You are reading correctly.  It is FREE!!!!!  Yes, there is no charge...at least not at this time.  However, there is no need to fret.  A warning will precede any financial changes.  For those who choose to remain consistent prior to any financial changes, will receive a gift from me.  For those who choose to remain consistent whether a fee is added to my blog/vlog will receive a gift and a discounted rate to the charge.

Submission Criteria at this time - 

Choose any category you are interested in.  There is no limit.  

Your submission must be clear, 

in line with the proper category (as much as possible), 

no limit to word count, 

no limit to video time, 

no profanity, 

proofread and edit all materials prior to submission, 

no plagiarizing,  

note all sources, give credit where credit is due,

 respect all individuals regardless of gender, race, religion, beliefs, sexual preference, etc.

Where do you fit in?

Check out blogs/vlogs before contributing:

Exhale to Excel - My very first blog.  I started this blog initially as a journal of anything I thought would interest my readers.  Nya's Project is my equal educational blog built to support my business, Nya's Project.  Exhale to Excel Book Review discusses "my opinion only" about new author's books.  Today's Lady Chaplain gives an insight on spirituality and different instances in life (how spirituality plays a role).   Lastly, A Black Woman's Guide to Financial Emancipation is all about money talk.

Please click below to review.

************Once you have selected your category, comment in this blog (comment section) the categories you choose along with an intro of yourself then copy your comment go to my Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/aroundthetablediscussion to paste your comment under the welcome bloggers/vloggers post (after you join the group of course).  Note that, All of our updates and pertinent information will be kept in the FB group.  

 

Exhale to Excel

Nya's Project

Book Review

Today's Lady Chaplain

A Black Woman's Guide to Financial Emancipation

Nikki Ruffin-Smith

Success Strategist, Chaplain, Educational Consultant, Author

www.nyasproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/nikki.ruffinsmith

https://www.facebook.com/groups/aroundthetablediscussion/exhaletoexcel@gmail.com

nikkichelle05@gmail.com

5 Weeks Book Writing. Publishing Work Shop, and "Training Days" As of August 2019

Here Is What I Can Provide for You TODAY as of August 2019:

If you are interested in writing your book and/or completing your book and/or publishing I am able to provide - 

One on One Coaching

Zoom Meet- Up on line once I receive at the minimum 5 people interested 

9 pm central

Every Tues and Thurs

Is Your Book Already Done?  Perfect.  Let's get it published 

Do the publishing yourself OR let me do it for YOU through 

what I call "Training Days" - One on One Coaching

For more information about me, for the Training Days Break Down. and price list-

click below

5 Weeks Book Writing. Publishing Work Shop, and "Training Days" As of August 2019

Diamond

Resurrect Your Self Esteem

Your self-esteem, or how you judge yourself, plays a significant role in many other aspects of your identity. Everything from how you feel about your own worth, how confident you are, how much you treat yourself with compassion, and how much you confront and handle your own problems are all influenced by your self-esteem.

Your self-esteem also plays a vital role in how you live your life, and your low self-esteem could be holding you back from living the life you have always wanted.

Your self-esteem plays a vital role in:

• Your outlook on life
• Whether or not you take risks
• Whether you are a leader or a follower
• If you try hard to get what you want
• Living life on your terms
• Following your true passion in life
• Honoring your personal boundaries
• Controlling negative thinking and self-doubt
• Your confidence in your goals as well as your ability to achieve them

If you are tired of your low self-esteem influencing your life and controlling your destiny, then you are ready to do something about it.

To learn more about the power of self-esteem, including effective strategies for enhancing your self-assessment and confidence, you need to read The Complete Guide to Self-Esteem.

This definitive guide helps you explore your sense of self and determine if your self-esteem is holding you back from living the life you want.

Pre Order yourcopy today for only 12.99!

Pre Order the book and workbook together for only 22.99!

Peace and Blessings,

Nikki

Life Coach and Education Consultant

Seasons Change - The Perfect Surrender

 Seasons Change- 

The Perfect Surrender 

The second book to Season's Change and So Do We, is being developed right NOW.  

This is Terri's Story.  What may seem like a little thing to you may be the very thing that rips someone else apart. 
_______________________________________________

As the rain fell on the car window pane, the tears fell from her eyes almost simultaneously.  Terri heard the rain or did she hear her tears splatter against the steering wheel as she gripped it for dear life.  Life?  What is life when all you feel is pain, she thought.  The pain was supposed to be gone by now.  It wasn't.  In fact, it seemed to consume every aspect of her being on a daily basis.  The night before, she found herself unable to breathe while lying on her in bed on her back, a position she slept in for as long as she could remember.

The phone vibrated against Terri's leg, startling her.  She remembered she was supposed to be going to the grocery store. Terri told her company she'd return shortly but had been gone for almost an hour.  Really she was only three houses down the street.  Thank God for the rain.  If Auntie Leigh  had decided to walk the Sunny, she would see Terri's ivory BMW easily from the house.  At this particular time though, Terri couldn't move, even to save face.  The pain was just too much right now.

"Lord, give me the strength," Terri screamed.  "How could this happen?"  Terri's whole career had been built on her family's name.  Everyone who knew the McRichards family knew their blood line and it's pure lineage was unique because almost every African American person living has at least 1 percent of white blood.  Not the McRichards!  They were African and Native American through and through...or so they thought. 

American History doesn't teach that the American Indians had slaves also.  Black people even had slaves in America.  Although the treatment of the slaves were quite different, they all owned slaves nonetheless.  Terri knew all of this.  She wasn't proud of her family being enslaved by the natives but she was proud that they were able to live as freely as possible on the Indian Reservations.

To find out now that her great great great grandfather was white and wore a hood and white robe devastated her.  

The idea of going on public television responding to all the folks who openly laughed at her made Terri's stomach do somersaults.  As she thought of her situation, a text came through from Nia.

"Terri, please stop where you are and read now..."



Psalm 34:17-19 - The Lord is Our Strength. “When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

Psalm 40 King James Version (KJV)

40 I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry.

2 He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.

3 And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord.


4 Blessed is that man that maketh the Lord his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.


Philippians 4:8 New International Version (NIV)

8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Deuteronomy 31:8 New International Version (NIV)

8 The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”



Order both books by sending a request and 13.99 for each book here- www.paypal.me/exhale2excel

Shield Your Energy

You Are Who You Mix With 

Ever had that moment where you hang out with a friend so much, you start to become so similar? Following the Mathematical Law of Averages, we are what we repeatedly consume.

We are the average of our closest friends, the books we read most, and the media we take in every day. Consumption Check List out the top 10 attributes that you see in yourself as of now. This could be in terms of behavioral traits or personality.

The first description that comes into your mind should be the ones reflected in this list. It can be either positive or negative.

This will be called the “Attributes List”.

a. Subsequently, write down a list of things that make you feel abundant. Be specific. This could be from being cognitively stimulated like learning new skills to being more positive. This is your “Abundance List”.

b. Put the “Abundance List” side by side with your Attributes List. Do your traits help you in achieving these goals?

c. Note down the traits that will improve your chances of achieving your goals.

In a 24-hour period, write down the top three people you interact with the most. This is measured by how often you talked to them, texted them, or any form of communication.

a. Create an “Attributes List” for them and compare it with your “Abundance List”.

b. Note down their traits that will improve or deprive your chances of achieving your goals.

c. If their traits are negatively affecting you, then they are taking abundance away from you.

This does not mean that you cut all ties with them. Just try to interact less and find someone more worthwhile to spend time with. Next, note down the the top three sources of information that you have taken in today. This could vary from newspapers, to online articles, and even books. Similarly, determine whether they align to building, or maintaining your abundance.

Does it help you to learn that new skill you wanted to learn? Or enable you to have a more positive way of thinking?

Finally, you are now conscious of what you consume.

Remove or minimize the activities or people that do not help you build or maintain abundance, and take in more good habits. Read better books. Make time for better people.

Simultaneously, you will find yourself living better.

Source:

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/thinkdigital-client/pdfs/AshleighBlatt-3IncomeStreams.pdf

Crafting Your Mission Statement

A well-crafted mission statement can help you focus on your business better. When you decide to create a mission statement, it requires that you sit down and truly consider what you want to accomplish with your business outside of making money. A mission statement needs to explain why your business exists. It guides your actions (and the actions of your entire organization) by providing a path toward reaching the business's goals.

Most mission statements encompass just a few sentences that answer:

* Why does your business exists? - If you don't know why you're doing it, you can't do it well.

* Who does your business exists for? - You have to know your audience to deliver the right products and services.

* What product or services do you offer to them? - If you can't describe what you provide, it'll be hard to move forward. It's easy if your product is tangible, such as ice-cream or widgets.

* How your business is unique? - What differentiates your products/services from the competition? Why are yours better?

Once you answer the questions, consider that your rough draft in which you can now find better words to describe each answer, forming a cohesive mission statement.

Your mission statement comprises just a few sentences, making up a concise paragraph that describes why your business exists, for whom, what products you deliver, and how they're different from the competition. The words you use must be understandable to your audience. Get the opinion of your audience about whether it makes sense or not.

Your mission statement is for you and those who work for you to keep focus on what is important. It doesn't have to really resonate with those outside of the business. But it does need to help guide you forward and inspire you to reach the ideas within the mission statement. It needs to describe what's truly important about your business, outside of money.

The mission statement should focus on your core competency. What is it that you do for others? Let's look at a couple mission statements for an example.

An Architects' Mission Statement: NewSouth Architects, http://www.jamescaudle.com/

"Our Mission: To design and build dreams through excellence in design talent, inspirational leadership, budget consciousness, sustainable and innovative architecture while adhering to the highest in creative and ethical standards to achieve overwhelming client satisfaction."

It's clear what this company's mission is when reading this mission statement. They're in the design business but also in the bringing dreams to life business. Sure, they make money, but it's not the mission.

Ben & Jerry's Mission Statement: Ben & Jerry's, http://www.benjerry.com

"Social Mission: To operate the Company in a way that actively recognizes the central role that business plays in society by initiating innovative ways to improve the quality of life locally, nationally and internationally.

Product Mission: To make, distribute and sell the finest quality all natural ice cream and euphoric concoctions with a continued commitment to incorporating wholesome, natural ingredients and promoting business practices that respect the Earth and the Environment.

Economic Mission: To operate the Company on a sustainable financial basis of profitable growth, increasing value for our stakeholders and expanding opportunities for development and career growth for our employees."

Two very different examples, but none of them mention making money as their mission. One is short and to the point, and one has longer and more elaborate missions for different areas. You can be as elaborate as you want with your mission statement, and you can have more than one mission statement, like Ben & Jerry's. But the point is to give you and your employees a reason for being, an answer as to what you do, who you do it for, and why you do it.

Morning Motivation 1

I Am Not From Here

I come from a land of milk and honey

I come from long sweet days where the sky is always sunny

I come from prophets and kings 

I come from heiresses and queens

I come from the BOLD and the FREE

I come from liberty

I come from royalty at it's finest

Simply put, my lineage is the mightiest

I come from the beginning of Science, Technology, Engineering, Math and ART

 My ancestors legacy is as bright as "burning sands" sketched in the memory of my heart

I'm in Him, He is in me; I'm in Her, She is in me ...slavery physically separated us but we'll never part

Because we were stolen from our land oh so long ago

Our tongues speak a language we thought we'd never know

No matter my language now, my soul remembers the kingdom I called home

Now I build a kingdom here based on memories, ancestral recollections, and dreams of my own

  Where the sound of.the drums beat loudly calling each of my ancestor's names.  I feel their blood, which is my blood, moving profusely through my veins.

I graciously thank the heavens for granting me this life-time, where I'm free to remember, resemble, and reenact the ancestors ways

I'll carry the precious tunes with me for the rest of my days

By:  Nikki Ruffin-Smith

"How Can You Mend A Broken Heart?"

I can think of younger days when to live for my life Was everything a man could want to do I could never see tomorrow I was never told about the sorrow   How can you mend a broken heart? How can you stop the rain from falling down? (tell me) How can you stop that old sun from shining? What makes the world go round?  How can you mend this broken man (woman)? (yeah) How can a loser ever win?  Somebody please help me mend my broken heart And let me live again...  Rev. Al Green 

The days after my mom passed were normal days, or at least I thought.  I hadn't really had the chance to grieve.  As a wife, mother, and career woman, grieving was the last thing on my mind.  Truly my heart hurt but hurting was something I had learned to put aside so many years ago.  Yes, I was wise enough to know though, the grief would come.  I knew it would come like a thief in the night taking me on a ride I had not prepared my mind, body, or soul to travel on.  I knew it was inevitable.  Again, I kept putting it out of my mind. 

About a year later to be exact, grief visited me.  Grief burst through my front and back doors.  At first it was like I had eaten something that didn't sit well on my stomach.  Then, a few weeks later, I got the flu.  Colds aren't something I get.  So, immediately I knew something else deeper was going on.  I remember visiting my older daughter one weekend, hoping to have a good time with her and my grandson.  What happened was totally unexpected.  When I went to bed the night I got there, I treated my cold symptoms with regular cold meds, like I had in the past.  Because of my rarity to get colds, over the counter meds worked very well for me.  I figured I would be all better in the morning.  That night I woke up though, to the most excruciating pain in my legs.  I had fever also.  I immediately thought I had pneumonia.  Just as soon as I could gather myself to take more medicine, my mind drifted to the day my mom was carried out of this very house, wrapped in a sheet.  My body violently shook!  I thought I was going to lose my mind.  I couldn't scream, for fear of waking the kids.  All I could do was be alone with my thoughts.  Be alone with my tears.   

I began to repeat: 

A Psalm of David. 

23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. 3 He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake. 

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. 

5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever. 

What else do you do?  You revert to what you know.  You reach for what you've learned would get you through.  I needed help.  I needed someone bigger than a person.  But...the funny thing was, I didn’t know if I truly wanted help.  I was in turmoil for sure.  Truly I was sick in body, spirit and mind.  Yet, part of me wanted to lay there in it.  I didn't see coming out of it as a blessing because my mom wouldn't be there.  I wanted her.  My heart was broken.  My heart was broken.  My heart was broken.  I wanted to be with her.  I wanted to die. 

I was/am smart enough to know, people die from broken hearts.  Did I really want to die? Maybe or maybe at that moment it really didn't matter.  Then again, I guess it did.  Who would look after my family if I were to leave?  Yeah, someone would but it wouldn't be me.  I couldn't bear the thought.  Knowing these things still didn't give me the strength to change my thoughts though.  I wanted my mommy badly.  As I cried out for her, the day started breaking.  I knew my older daughter would be home from work soon so I had to dry my tears fast.  How?  The pain was way too great.  It was no use trying, I had no will at that moment to do anything differently but lay there exhausted from pain and tears.   My baby came through the door shocked to see me wide awake with tears in my eyes.  Instantly she knew the pain.  

Her pain for my mommy was also rearing its' ugly head.  She came over and hugged me really tight. 

She said, "Mommy what would I do without you?  Gran Gran doesn't want this for you.  You have to 

get up.  You have to."  I told her I missed my mommy way too much.  Getting up was way too hard. 

She understood but told me to please try.  I got up then. I had to.  What mother wouldn't give 

her entire being in order to soothe her child?  I had to and I did.   

I thanked my daughter for being the friend I needed.  If she had not been there, I don't know what I

would have done.  There was more to our conversation that morning but those words are what really 

woke me up.   The day my daughter saved me is the day I began my healing.  

Now I refuse to die from a broken heart or anything for that matter.  The point of the story I suppose 

is to recognize, respect where you are, remember who and whose you are, and regain control of your 

wonderful life.  Ultimately this is what our loved ones want for us.  We all know, if they could come 

back to us, they really wouldn't.  They have crossed over to where we all will be.  Yes, you'll always 

have moments of sadness.  Those moments are normal.  Those moments show us we are humans 

having human experiences.  It's ok, just don't stay there.   

Choose to mend your heart.